The Worst Store In The World

It's that time of year. Snow, deer, lots of lights and baked goods. Small children dreaming of sugar plums and Santa. With all the cheer of the holiday season there is of course, one downfall, well, other than the relatives fighting, the christmas tree fires, and the weight gain from all the goodies. One tops them all, Christmas shopping. The bane of our existance, or at least mine. First there is the task of figuring out everyone you need to buy gifts for, friends, family, and co-workers. Not to mention arranging for any surprise gifting from neighbors. I suggest 2 or 3 stockpiled gifts, and make sure it's something you'll use, just incase you're stuck with it. A food gift basket is a great idea. Sure, you could always regift, but that's not an option you want to bank on, and should be used as a last resort.

Then there's determining how to get the gifts, you could go homemade, with cookies, candies, and quilts. You could go semi-homemade, pick a theme, pick a basket and fill it accordingly, some great ones here are movie night (made great with popcorn, movie style candy, and gift cards to pizza places or blockbuster.), South of The Border (mini pinata's, gold coins, spicy sauces, various types of rice and beans), Italian (fresh made pasta's wrapped in cellophane with pretty bows, jars of pasta sauce, bread dough mix.) You could buy premade gift baskets, or other store merchandise.

If you choose this last route you must then go to the store, which is a journey itself. I have some tips. Tip #1 Pack water, and crackers, you never know when you'll be able to stop for sustenance, or the price when you do. You're better off bringing your own than being a victim of price gouging just because your mouth feels like a dirty gym sock, and your stomach's about to stage mutiny. Tip #2 Don't go shopping on Black Friday if you can avoid it. Black Friday is the day after Thanksgiving, notorious for it's specials, sales, deals, oh yeah, also traffic accidents, pick-pocketing, shoplifting, and lines three miles long. They even start at two am. Tip #3 Avoid Walmart at all costs. It'll only serve to give you a headache. No parking spaces, long lines, screaming kids, it's my version of hell.

The one thing that always amazes me while shopping at this time of year, are the kids. They behave horribly, that's not really the surprise. The surprise is that the parents can't control them. That's just bad parenting. They need to teach their children ahead of time, or if all else fails, threaten them. "Santa won't come if you don't stop it right now and sit quietly in the cart Bobby!"